Relationships work when both people get their needs met. These three words make that happen. I saw the email as soon as my coaching call finished. My client had emailed me twenty minutes before our session, saying he was ill and could we reschedule? I hadn’t seen his email, and in our “Hi, how are…
DetailsForgiveness has gifts for us, if we are ready. Feelings that protect us can also hold us back. We hear a lot about forgiveness — why it is important, good for us, and worth attempting. But why is it so hard? How do we know that we are ready? What is forgiveness? Forgiving is not…
DetailsMy co-parenting segment starts @ 25 minutes.
In a recent post, I acknowledged three women who influenced and inspired me: Mary Tyler Moore, Gloria Steinem and Melody Beattie. Here I celebrate two more who shaped how I approach my world. In my family, anger was a subject only to be glanced at from the corner of our eyes. My father would…
DetailsMy years as a young working mother passed in a blur of seemingly endless tasks and challenges. I often wondered if I was doing things right, or enough, or how to measure up to so many expectations. I looked forward to Wednesday nights, when “You’re Going to Make it After All”, the theme song for…
DetailsDivorce brings new realities flooding in from all sides. Some of them we won’t want to look at. We are often urged to accept reality. Sounds obvious and reasonable, doesn’t it! Too bad it’s so hard to do. When I struggle to accept something, it’s because I want my world to be one way, and…
DetailsI cannot call fear a friend. Fear is a companion whose influence has only become clear to me in the last 10 years. It visits me regularly, invisible yet powerful. I have taped a sign right below my computer screen: “LET GO OF FEAR”. I seldom notice it, but every now and then it grabs…
DetailsYour marriage is ending, and you are a parent. In the midst of upheaval and strong feelings, you have to make complex and critically important choices. Where to live? How to keep finances manageable? If and how to use lawyers? How to divide parenting time and responsibilities? No matter how frantic or devastated you feel,…
DetailsOur children change every day as they grow; as parents we are on an endless path of learning and growing, too. What should I say now? How can I get that done? Add divorce and it can be overwhelming. I have heard that soldiers from the world wars defined themselves in the intensity of battle…
DetailsI wasn’t always sure that I wanted kids. My feminist self feared that motherhood would shuffle me off to the sidelines of life. Early in my career, professional success gleamed like a silver bauble on the Christmas tree, and I had no way to comprehend how it might tarnish. Nor had I any idea, really,…
DetailsI have never met Oriah Mountain Dreamer, but she set me on the path to write about co-parenting after divorce. She inspired me with her books: ‘The Invitation”, “The Dance” and others. She writes tender, vulnerable thoughts full of what is possible. It was three pages in “The Dance” that grabbed me years ago, where…
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